Third nipple

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Who among us can claim not to have felt the vague tugs from beyond the veil, the feint whisperings calling across from the deep black ether, curious events that cannot be dismissed as plain happenstance or mere coincidence.
You've been thinking about your brother all day long, a telephone rings, you meet a stranger on the bus, it's not a stranger but the bus conductor who you've not seen since last tuesday, you get off at lurleen because you accidencally boarded the non-cancer bus and need a smoke, a dog runs by, it has the face of the ghost of Stanley Mathews, you follow it, it's not a dog but a cat, you hate cats, you hit it with a rolled up newspaper, it attacks you and severely maims you because it's really a giant mutant space raider, you are in hospital and there at your bedside is your brother Stuart quietly weeping into her hands.
Coincidence? I rather think not.
Now what if you could control these unseen forces, manipulate the very fabric of the universe and see through time and space, beyond the veil, beyond next friday, into another world. What price? At what cost? What if you could join an elite rank of seers and mystics whose ranks throughout history have included such luminaries as Anne Bolyn, Scaramanga, Krusty the Klown and Chandler Bing. What if you could achieve this by simply multiplying your current nipple total by three and dividing it by two

3. 2. 32. Do you see? DO YOU?

The number 32 trancends everything, even itself. It is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end, all other numbers are an illusion created by 3 and 2, it is birth and life and destruction and death. I can prove it, I've seen it.

  • In the Kabbalah, there are 32 Kabbalistic Paths of Wisdom. 32!
  • The Digha Nikaya attributes The Buddha with 32 physical characteristics. 32!
  • A football is made with 32 panels of leather unless its the Jabulani. BZZT!
  • Adult human beings have 32 teeth. Remove them and count them if you don't believe me. Liquid diet!
  • In a song on the 1974 experimental album The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway by the band Genesis the chamber contained neither 31 nor 33 doors but 32. 32!
  • The atomic number of germanium. 32!
  • The freezing point of water at sea level. 32! degrees Fahrenheit!
  • The ninth happy number. The happiest number. 32!
  • In Chaldean numerology the number 32 is connected to future events. 32!
  • Gravity accelerates objects at 32 feet per second. Per second!
  • On Alastor Crowleys Thoth Tarot has received 32 five star reviews one of which was helpful to 32 people. Great Beast!

Do you see now? The universe and matter untangling before your very eyes, it's yours for the taking and all you have to do is take off all your clothes and, unf, yea, touch yourself, that's right, just like that, squeeze it, unh, yea, oh that's good.

Reply hazy, try again

It just so happens that this can all be yours. There is a place, a very 'special' place, created by 'special' people, where the stars are aligned in just the right way

Unzip him Mr. Bubbles! UNZIP HIM!

Beneath the waves and far from the ever watchful eyes of God lies the ocean cathedral of Rupture. Some say it was built by a twisted genius as a haven for fringe scientists, others by a lunatic purely for tax reasons and others still say it's the unwanted offspring of an idiot and a blind man. The truth will never be known as its secrets are long buried but it is known that dark magics still linger and fell creatures, ejaculated from some dark and unseen abyss, still stalk the hallways. It is here in the very bowels of this bastard construction that ye will find what ye seek.

sekrit truths

With your new found ability you will see the world in a new light, discover hidden pattens deep within the fabrics of time and space and have an attractive extra nipple. You can use this new ability to peek into the future with fortune and reveal the unforeseen destinies of those around you.

Racial Mutations AbominationChromemouthChudEmpathGenetic PurityHideous FreakVampireZombie
Focus Mutations CarrieChillerFuck MachineSalamanderScreechWrithing Smoke
Movement Mutations LeapfrogPhaserClairvoyance
Soak Mutations High DensityFirewalkerRubberskinSnakeskinYeti Skin
LithodermisSolar SpongeSilicone SkinEelskinYeti Fur
Miscellaneous Mutations BillygoatBleederBloodhoundBrainslugBrute StrengthCamelfatEnigmaFibrocartilageHooliganHyperimmuneIron LiverJunkratMuleNimble FingersPlant WhispererRipperStenchTwitchy NervesSuperclotXray Vision
Joke Mutations Cat Ears • Caucasian • Third Nipple
Defunct Mutations Jammer